Awkward we

We’ve all had best friends. Closed friends and loved ones. We’ve been through a part where they have left us for a new town, to join a different school or get a new job. We’ve said goodbyes to so many, right since the time our age was just a single digit number. But have we really mastered the art of saying a goodbye to someone we don’t really want to in the first place?

I think not. I feel we have just grown more and more awkward as we’ve grown up. We are living in an age where we regularly post the quotes about friendship and togetherness on our social networking accounts. Sadly it has replaced the open hugs we shared and tears we let come out when our best friend was moving to a different city because his/her father was transferred there. Those days, we did not really wait for the person to fade away into the mesh of traffic and later on text them our true feelings. We let them know that they were our best buddies and yes it hurts like a bitch to see each other moving apart, far from each other.

We know who our best friends are. But we don’t really know how much they mean to us until we drop them off at the airport or the station to watch them go away. Maybe we are respecting our goals too much to even ask them to simply stay back. Stay back with us. Even if they can’t.
A goodbye hug is simply not enough. I’m sorry but it does not do justice to how much you love someone and the amazing memories you’ve carved together. We’ve grown so awkward that it takes us a couple of years and a bottle of whisky to confess that the best times were what we had spent together. And then we cry because, those tears had been waiting for long to express how much we missed each other. We then share the part of the picture that we remember and they tell us the part they haven’t forgotten as we join the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle we used to as kids. Only to grow up and realize that it was lot simpler.

How many times have we backspaced the text we planned to send across and how many times our nervous fingers stopped our hearts from making the phone call that had become so difficult to make thanks to the ‘awkwardness’ now standing as a barrier between two.  One stupid fight and an ego that replaced the word ‘sorry’ which would have probably let us still talking to that person.

Back in school, I remember being jealous of people elder to me, who were working and did not need to dress up in a uniform to attend a school every day. I envied them because they had no homework and exams to write. True, exams were not fun. But I somehow miss the awkwardness-free part of that phase of life. 

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